What stopped me were my boyfriend, three sets of eyes and the reminder that there were two more sets upstairs. We have three dogs and two cats. If we split up, who gets custody of the animals?
My background with conflict and bipolar disorder…
When confronted with intense conflict, I tend to flee. I grew up in a dramatic household with a single mother who is bipolar, so whenever I’m in the presence of “crazy” I just want to get away. I know that people who suffer from bipolar disorder will bristle at the term “crazy,” but being spanked for a week for cutting my hair when I was 5 years old is crazy to me. Being beaten awake with a 2×4, because my mother thought I told a lie is crazy to me. Being hit with a bat, because I was 2 minutes late to curfew is crazy to me. Being called a whore, because a man said I was growing into a pretty young lady is crazy to me.
I know that not all people who suffer from bipolar disorder behave this way, but this was my experience. So when our “guest” flipped out within 2 minutes of me entering the room, I lost it. It was too similar to my interactions with my mother and I simply wanted to get away.
When a relationship ends…
Were our relationship to end, three people would be hurt (me, my boyfriend, and his son), five pets would go through a difficult time (can I even keep 5 pets on my own, would I have to surrender them, separate them?), and three people would be celebrating and they don’t deserve that satisfaction.
As the weekend moved on, I really saw my boyfriend and how much he loves our dogs. I would listen to him in the other room talking to the dogs, watch him rolling around on the floor with the dogs, and excitedly answer his dog related questions. He’s just as interested in giving them a happy home and life as I am. He’s 100% behind my blog, our holistic food choices, and our investment in pet insurance.
My Facebook relationship status…
I was going to change my relationship status to “complicated” simply because I was feeling angry, hurt, and passive aggressive. Instead, I chose to set some boundaries and move on. I’m still in a relationship and our dogs and cats are still happily in their home.
It’s sort of creepy to think that we may have been forced into a position of giving up our dogs, because of a third party. It’s hard to find a rental on short notice that would accommodate 5 pets. Whenever I hear stories of people giving up their pets, I think to myself that I would do anything to keep my pets together and I would, but there was that sharp hint of doubt this weekend that made me realize that I shouldn’t be so quick to judge others who are in a similar situation.
Have you ever had to give up a pet, because your relationship status changed?
With Mommy Bloggers being all the rage, Kimberly Gauthier writes about dogs and being a Fur Mom. She don't have kids, so she's been on the receiving end of the "it'll happen" statements and looks of pity when people realize that she's made it to the big FOUR OH without conceiving. Fur Mommy Bloggers have a voice too and Gauthier intends to profile her journey with "The Fur Mom" feature on the Girl Power Hour blog. She says, we spoil our kids, we worry about nutrition and we schedule play dates...just as fur mom's do. And let's face it, puppy classes are a lot less spendy than private school. Follow Kimberly on Twitter at @TheFurMom
* This post is from a Girl Power Hour featured blogger. It is not written, edited or endorsed by Girl Power Hour. The authors are solely responsible for content.
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